When Los Angeles DJ Matthew Roberts began searching for his biological parents 12 years ago, there's no way he could have imagined the truth he'd eventually discover.
His father is serial killer Charles Manson.
"I didn't want to believe it. I was frightened and angry. It's like finding out that Adolf Hitler is your father. I'm a peaceful person -- trapped in the face of a monster," Roberts told The Sun.
Roberts says his mother was raped by Manson in a drug-fuelled orgy back in the 60s. After his birth, she gave him up for adoption. He grew up in Rockford, Ill.
Years later, he was able to track her down, but it took even longer for the truth about his father to come out, Roberts says. Eventually though, his mother revealed the identity of his father, he says.
Roberts, 41, says that through letters with Manson, he has confirmed the serial killer is indeed his father, The Sun reported:
Matthew says: "He sends me weird stuff and always signs it with his swastika. At first I was stunned and depressed. I wasn't able to speak for a day. I remember not being able to eat."
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According to Matthew, the letters mainly rambled and said "crazy things" but Manson did confirm he could be his father.
In one twisted letter he wrote: "The truth is the truth. The truth hurts."
Manson remains in jail for the murders of actress Sharon Tate and six others.
Matthew says he continues to struggle with the truth.
"He's my biological father -- I can't help but have some kind of emotional connection. That's the hardest thing of all -- feeling love for a monster who raped my mother.
"I don't want to love him, but I don't want to hate him either."
