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This ‘unspoken rule' about where moms should park at the grocery store is riling up the internet

“I didn’t realize this was a hot take.”

Strip mall parking lot.
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A TikToker’s “unspoken rule” about where mothers should park in shopping centers has blown up on TikTok.

“People just want to pick a fight,” Stefany, a mom in New Jersey who declined to share her last name for privacy reasons, tells TODAY.com. “I gave my opinion and this is my golden rule and if you don’t follow it, then it doesn’t apply to you and that’s OK.”

Stefany posted a TikTok video of a shopping center parking lot, pointing out an empty space right next to the cart corral.

“We all have the same unspoken rule, right?” Stefany said in the video. “If you’re shopping and this spot is open, that’s not for you. That’s for a mom with their kids that needs to come and unload right next to the cart drop, right?”

Stafany captioned the video, “It’s a safety thing. Please leave that spot open for moms shopping solo with their kiddos.”

TikTok responded with almost 30,000 comments.

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Some parents said the space offers accessibility to the cart station and others said they don’t want special treatment. Some commenters said parking spaces designated for moms discriminate against people with disabilities, fathers with small children and the elderly.

Comments included:

  • “Yes! It makes loading and unloading so much easier.”
  • “Nope. As a single female, that is my spot of choice as well.”
  • “What about dads with kids?”
  • “As a senior, I choose that spot. Grab a cart for balance and can return it when I’m done.”
  • “I always make a point to park there so there is less access to me and my kids from a random stranger.”
  • “I always park there but that’s about to change. Much love to all mamas.”
  • “Sorry, no. As a mom of four, I never expected it to be saved. And now that mine are grown, if it's open, I park there.”
  • “I’m the mom that parks there. It makes keeping an eye on my kids easier when I need to return the cart. But I don’t care if anyone else parks there. I’ll just park somewhere else.”
  • “Never heard that. But it could also be for a guy with two bad knees, a pulled groin and an amputated toe.”
  • “I park there so I can return my cart easily.”
  • “I always appreciate when this spot is open and I have my kiddos by myself.”
  • “I wish this was a law.”
  • “All I see is an available spot.”
  • “That’s my favorite parking spot as a childless cat lady.”

Stefany, whose children are 3 and 1, tells TODAY.com that she made the PSA after a “rare” shopping trip alone.

“When parking, I noticed that I skipped that spot,” says Stefany. “It’s the same as if I held the door open for the person behind me. That’s just the way I think.”

Stefany points out that women-only or family-only parking spaces exist in other countries. GermanySouth KoreaSwitzerland and France have implemented these parking spaces at various points in history.

“I leave this spot open for moms with kids,” says Stefany. “It gives me a little more security and comfort knowing that I’m not parked in between two cars. I can turn my back to load the kids into the car knowing there is nothing behind me.”

Stefany says her “rule” applies to anyone who likes or needs the convenience and security of the specific spot.

“Some people park in the furthest spot away to get their steps in or want to park next to a lamp post” at night, she says. “I’m learning that people have very specific parking preferences.”

The response to her video, says Stefany, is staggering.

“I didn’t realize this was a hot take,” she says. “It doesn’t discourage me because for those people who now think differently in a parking lot, it’s completely worth it ... I feel strongly about choosing to leave that spot open for moms and I will continue to do it.”

Stefany adds, “Parking in modern civil society exists and people can be kind and courteous — we’re just not there yet.”

This story first appeared on TODAY.com. More from TODAY:

 

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